Wedding Fun

Alert: America is now in the wedding season.
Yes, that's right folks, we are back into the yearly trend that comes each spring and lasts into the early fall. It is that special time of year where every Saturday fancy hotels, gardens and banquet halls are rented out for the exchanging of vows and boogieing down that is sure to follow. Months of planning, prepping and stressing all come together on that one evening/afternoon/midmorning (if you booked too late to get a good time slot).
Glancing through the Announcements page of the local newspaper on a Sunday morning you are sure to come across some happy love birds posing on their big day. A thumbnail sketch of the event is usually described such as the ceremony and reception location. If the beach was involved you usually will read about that, too. But most of the article will usually be about how they met and where they work and what city they will reside in now that they are man and wife.
But every once in a while you will read about a lavish event fit for an Arabian Prince/Princess - an extravaganza that makes Martha Stewart Weddings magazine look like a backyard barbeque.
Yara and Dr. Shoemaker (Doctor, of course), married at a court house last year but waited for wedding season to get the party started. And start it did they ever! Of course, the event was outside at a mansion on the beach. Can you say $$$?
Add a few more $$$ because they brought in an orchestra. Obviously.
But an orchestra wasn't enough because Jackie Evancho (child protegee opera singer) jumped out of a cake and sang her little heart out. Okay, so I don't know if she jumped out of a cake per-se, but it was a surprise performance. I'm picturing a Singing in the Rain moment akin to when Debbie Reynolds bursts out of a cake at a Monumental Pictures shindig. Jackie is small enough, she could surely fit in a mock cake.
But maybe that would be too 1950's and not "hip" enough.
The wedding belly dancer was definitely 21st century. And so was the 15 minute fireworks display.
So, this got me thinking: where was the helicopter?
The happy couple really should have departed from a specially heart-shaped helicopter pad built specifically for the occasion. The wedding party could have decorated the outside of the helicopter with gold studded cans and strings of pearls. Cute, right? Oh, and don't forget the "Just Married" sign. Every wedding helicopter must have the proper signage. Then they could have made a grand exit off to a private island at an undisclosed location in the Pacific Ocean. You need to keep some things under wraps so longitudinal location is under lock and key. Sorry.
And what wedding favors were distributed? I'm betting on an Benz E-Class Cabriolet. This is the beach, so convertibles just make sense. A coupe just wouldn't be as fitting. And an SUV would be ridiculous, unless it is for a big family. I hope Yara considered that in her planning.
The event really did look spectacular. The setting sun cast beautiful hues as a backdrop only God's handiwork can provide. The flowers were luxurious, providing a lush and elegant oasis. In each picture the guests looked thrilled to be receiving a Mercedes...er, I mean celebrating the love of the beaming bride and groom.
Overall, a beautiful celebration for the most precious of earthly unions: that of man and wife.
Now, on to the next matter of business. When is the baby arriving? Because the event planner needs to know if we're going for a pink or blue color scheme for the baby shower.