Don't lament what you don't have or wish away your circumstances. Choose to be the greatest lover of your life. It is a daily decision to be content and fulfilled. You don't need perfection to make that choice and you don't need "ideal circumstances." You just need the right attitude. You can look on a lousy, rainy day and see the possibility to get floor cleaning done in the house or you can look at that same rain and be annoyed that you can't tend your garden. Which outlook is more productive? Obviously, complaining about what you can't change does you no good. Making the most of a day stuck inside is a much better use of energy. The floors will thank you.
The same goes for our life outlook. One person may look at an illness as a set back. How can you advance in a career when you are constantly on sick-leave for chemotherapy treatments? Another person may look at such a devastating diagnosis and choose to make it a time of spiritual renewal and growth. Same set of circumstances, different outlook. Who do you think is more at rest and has more peace? Who do you think is losing their patience, crying and sinking into depression?
I've done my fair share of fighting against my circumstances. I've lost my patience, cried my eyes out and sunk into deep depression over my own health. When I look at those periods in my journey I am filled with regret. I wasted so much time focusing on things I couldn't change. I could have been taking that time to dig deeper into God's word, read more books, study about topics that interest me or learn an instrument - the possibilities for positive outlets reaches beyond my mind's imagination! Yet, I didn't do any of those things in my dark hours. I spent my time wishing I was in a different body, with a different life. That way of thinking did me no good.
Today it felt as though God was whispering in my ear a much needed reminder to not just accept my life as it is in this moment, but to embrace it and truly, honestly love it. Every morning I am given the renewed opportunity to enjoy where I am at in life. I have the choice.
Loving my life is as simple as that. It is a yes or no decision. When I say yes I open the door to all sorts of blessings I could have easily missed. My eyes are opened to the unique beauty of my situation. I have been blessed with the opportunity to focus on my physical restoration. During this phase in my life I don't have the responsibility of children and husband to take care of. I don't have a career that is vying for my attention and energies. I am not in a school atmosphere, surrounded by drama and worldly influences. I am set apart for a season...set apart for a reason.
When I fell away from God in college I went through a spiritual renewal. I had sinned, abandoned God, ignored his commands and acted in willful disobedience. Yet, he never let go of me. In the end he broke through to the core of my being, brining to my knees and transforming my heart. I have never been the same since that day. My spiritual being was restored from a fallen, rebellious sinner, blind to truth and lost in a den of satan's design. God took that lost girl loaded with the burden of sin and made her new.
Now he is doing the same with my physical body. It has been stripped of every last ounce of cushion, padding, support and insulation. My body has undergone such a destruction that its ability to function still amazes me. And still, God has never let me go. He has carried me when physical logic would argue that my body couldn't keep going. Somehow, God has made sure this body continues to function and, now, he is rebuilding it. He is restoring it to be a miraculous creation, better then it was before.
During this time I am enjoying the process of watching God work out his creation before my very eyes. I am getting a front row seat while he reveals his design. If I were focused on where my body isn't at, the weight it hasn't reached and the limitation it still must succumb to, I would miss the miracle God is performing. He is putting weight on this skeleton of skin and bones. He is empowering me to lift heavier weights every week with better form and smoother precision. He is enabling me to run farther, faster and longer. He is building the muscles in my body to walk up steeper hills and winding trails. Most importantly, he is renewing my energy to enjoy life with a greater passion then I have been able to experience in years.
I don't want to miss the miracle of my life and the beauty that God has set all around me. God, the lover of my soul and creator of my being, has given me a life worth embracing. Every day he is in my life, speaking to me through my circumstances, showing me more of himself. I don't want to miss a single moment of his design - be in difficulty or ease. He has designed it specifically and specially for me. If for no other reason, that is a life worth loving.