Yesterday I stood on the scale in the doctor's office and held my breath as the nurse moved the metal pieces up and down, side to side, to, once again, determine my weight. This is now my twice a week routine. At first I dreaded this moment. The number went up and down like a child playing with a yo-yo - a lot more downs then ups. After a few weeks of disappointing and unpredictable numbers I began to get used to the reality of this roller coaster ride I'm on. It isn't always pleasant and there are days I get frustrated at the lack of progress or absence of any gains whatsoever. But most days I accept that this is where I'm at and I'm okay with it.
What I've learned in the last few months, and really over the past two years, is that I am engaged in a battle for my life - and not just my physical life. When you look at the number on the scale it is obvious that there is a crisis of sorts taking place in my body. Many people have perished at weights higher then mine. A dangerously low BMI is anything under 16 or so. I'd love a BMI of 16. Right now I'm looking forward to hitting 15. That is the war on my body and the severity of its attack is extreme. It has ripped away from me my cushioning, padding and comfort. It has left me cold, weak, and tired. The physical toll has been dramatic. If you looked at me you would see only the outward struggles and the physical ailments that are plaguing me. Yet, the war that is being waged isn't really about all the physical that can be seen with the naked eye. In fact, the physical is the least of the battle.
The war being waged is truly one of spiritual proportions. The Bible warns us of this kind of attack. The Bible tells us that we will come under attack because there is a spiritual battle being waged for our souls. This battle doesn't stop at the spiritual - it hits us right where it hurts (literally). 1 Peter 4:12-13 says, "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed." There is no getting around it. When we are one with Christ we will be one with his suffering. When we give our lives over to him we are singing on to willing bear a cross that won't always be pleasant and certainly won't be easy.
Satan wants our soul and he will use any and all tactics to grab hold of it. His desire to control our spiritual being cannot be separated from the physical. He attacks on the physical level to break down the spiritual. He uses the one thing we can't escape - our bodies - in an attempt to pull us away from God. He wants the very core of us. And he knows the physical body is a darn good way to get it.
The battle that we see from the outside is just the tip of the iceberg and it isn't where the true war is being waged. If we fight as if all we are up against is a physical ailment or disease then we are certain to lose. We must first see our enemy for WHO he is: Satan; and WHAT he wants: our soul. He is alive and well. He came to steal and destroy. And he wants God's people. If you are a follower of Christ consider yourself a name on Satan's hit-list.
Our only hope in a clear, concise victory is to enter the fight fit for a spiritual battle. The word of God, prayer, and the power of the Holy Spirit are to be our go-to weapons in our arsenal. Blood work, surgery and medications just muddy the waters if we aren't grabbing the right weaponry first and foremost. Satan wants us to miss the true purpose of the attack. He knows that if we miss what he's after we are defenseless. But, if we see the truth of why we are under attack we will know how to fight. And more importantly, we will know how to win.
The key to winning in the fight for our soul isn't finding the right doctor or checking in at the right hospital. It is in coming prepared to fight for the spiritual. When we wear the right armor and carry the right weapons God will take care of the physical.